this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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