my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize