What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
So much Jack, so little girl.
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