yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Randomize
