If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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