I feel like abortions should bother me more
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
