dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I want to fling myself into the sun
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
