An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
