Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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