cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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