the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Text me some of your sweat
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
