i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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