just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I understand Curling. That high.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
