Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
