Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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