just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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