You're my little dorito
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
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