The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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