oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
