Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
