omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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