dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize