im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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