are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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