yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
