# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
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