I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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