she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
