I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
