they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
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