We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
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