you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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