Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
