Dual....:-)
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Randomize
