brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
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