now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
