Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize
