If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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