I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
