FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize