They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
