Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I need moral support for this bender
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
