I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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