Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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