As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
