plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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