I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
