I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
