Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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