By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
